An Innocent, a Seduction, a Secret Read online

For a moment she felt totally disorientated, and then there was another voice. Far more familiar.

  Sebastio had come out of his office and was greeting Matteo. Edie realised she was standing in the middle of the grand hall in her bare feet. No make-up. She was wearing Sebastio’s clothes. She was holding a tray of food for lovers. She’d even plucked some ivy leaves from one of her displays and put them in a small vase.

  And now Sebastio was turning to look at her, his eyes widening as he took in what she was holding. The way she was dressed. In contrast to Edie he was pristine. Dressed in a suit. Had he known the real world was about to rush back in? Stupidly she felt betrayed.

  Before she could mortify herself any more she turned and fled back the way she’d come, almost tripping down the stairs to the kitchen in her haste. She had visions of staff arriving and tipped the food from the plates into a bin, before washing up and getting rid of the evidence of her stupidly misplaced hope...

  For what? she castigated herself. Hope that these past couple of days and nights had meant something to Sebastio? When he’d expressly told her that he wasn’t interested in anything?

  She heard a noise behind her and tensed.

  ‘Edie?’

  She closed her eyes for a moment and sucked in a fortifying breath before turning around and praying for a convincing show of nonchalance. Sebastio was looking at her, and she rushed to fill the silence before he could say anything.

  ‘I’m sorry. I should have realised that—’

  ‘Edie, you don’t have to explain—’

  ‘I didn’t know the snow had melted.’

  Sebastio’s chest felt tight. The expression of horror on Edie’s face in the hall was etched into his memory. Clearly she’d had no idea that normal service was about to resume. That she’d slept until almost lunchtime.

  He hadn’t gone to disturb her because, selfishly, a perverse part of him had relished the thought of her still sleeping in his bed, naked.

  When he’d seen her in the hall, wearing his clothes, barefoot and looking so deliciously rumpled, his brain had short-circuited. And then he’d realised that Matteo was also looking at her and that she was carrying a tray of food. For them.

  He’d been as guilty as her of assuming—hoping?—the world hadn’t started to turn again. He’d only realised that the thaw had set in at exactly the same moment his phone had started ringing off the hook.

  After stealing out of the bedroom and dealing with some calls he’d gone back upstairs and washed and changed, and as he’d looked at Edie sleeping in his bed, he’d selfisly left her there, her image burned onto his retina.

  He’d wanted to take her back to her own room last night after the shower, but at the last moment he’d given in to a weak urge and let her sleep in his bed. He’d sat in a chair in the corner of the room and looked at her for a long time. Watching the soft rise and fall of her chest.

  He should have felt angry at his lapse of control, for letting her see so much. But all he had felt was a curious kind of... He didn’t want to say peace. Maybe calm. A moment of catharsis.

  And now it mocked him, because of the way he’d allowed the lines to become blurred thanks to a bit of snow and an over-indulgence of pleasure. He should have been more vigilant.

  Now Edie had no expression on her face and that frustrated him. ‘I’m sorry. I should have warned you that everyone was coming back... I didn’t think you’d—’

  She put up a hand. ‘Please, don’t say anything. I should have noticed myself...’

  If I’d looked out of the window instead of superstitiously hoping nothing would change if I didn’t, Edie thought.

  Sebastio ran a hand through his hair. Edie couldn’t fail once again to notice how put-together he was compared to her. In control. Not affected.

  ‘Look, what we had for the past few days...and nights...it was intense. But I should have been more careful to make it clear that this is just—’

  ‘Sebastio, stop...’ Edie cut in, horrified that he felt the need to reiterate what he’d told her before. ‘You don’t need to say anything. I know that it was...intense. Maybe not what either of us were expecting... But you don’t need to worry. I’m not falling for you or anything like that.’

  Liar.

  She could feel heat rising and she rushed on. ‘I will admit that four years ago...when I approached you and you rejected me...I might have harboured a fantasy that things had turned out differently. Well, now they have...and that’s all this is for me. The fulfilment of a fantasy.’

  Edie held her breath. She was beyond mortified at having to spell out the fact that she’d thought about him for four years. But better that than his obvious suspicion that she was falling for him in spite of his warning.

  And she wasn’t, she told herself fiercely. She couldn’t be. She was smarter than that.

  Sebastio felt a mix of emotions. None of which he should be feeling. Edie looked so earnest he couldn’t not believe her. She clearly hated admitting it. And yet it wasn’t relief he was feeling to know that he’d simply fulfilled a fantasy. It was something closer to disgruntlement.

  He hated to admit it, but to think he was just some kind of box she’d ticked was seriously irritating. And he didn’t like the thought that he would merely be the first in a long line of lovers.

  Voices came from above. Staff returning.

  Edie looked panicked. ‘I should go and get dressed. There’s a lot of work to do before the party tomorrow night.’

  Sebastio stood back to let her pass. ‘Of course.’

  Their scent reached his nostrils. The scent of them together. It was unbelievably erotic and had an immediate effect on Sebastio’s arousal levels, which were constantly raised when this woman was near. As much as he wished he had burned through his desire for her over the space of a weekend, clearly it wasn’t going to be that simple.

  He caught her arm as she was about to walk past him. He felt the tension in her body. She looked at him. Eyes huge. Dark blue.

  ‘This isn’t over, Edie.’

  She didn’t say anything. Just pulled her arm free and went upstairs.

  Sebastio curbed the urge to go after her and remind her of what they’d shared over the past couple of days. He had the uncomfortable feeling that something had just slipped out of his grasp.

  * * *

  The following evening Edie was no less confused about Sebastio’s declaration. ‘This isn’t over.’

  She paced back and forth in her bedroom, eyeing the glossy black box on her bed. Another box. Containing another beautiful dress to seduce her with?

  Edie knew she wanted Sebastio. He didn’t need to buy her beautiful dresses in order to seduce her. She couldn’t imagine a day when she wouldn’t want him. That was what scared her.

  When she had seen the helicopter arriving and taking off yesterday she’d felt relieved for a second, thinking that Sebastio’s absence might actually help her rationalise how she was feeling. And then Matteo had given her a note.

  I have to go into town. I’ll be back tomorrow in time for the party.

  I want you there, Edie.

  SR

  Suddenly she’d been in turmoil again. She’d felt excitement, desire and panic, all mixed together. Panic because she really wasn’t sure she could let this go any further without getting seriously hurt.

  She stopped and looked at the box as if it was a ticking bomb. Eventually, because she couldn’t resist, she went and opened it, pushing back the layers of gold tissue paper. Gold!

  She lifted out a dress so stunning in its elegant simplicity that she gasped. It was black lace with a nude lining. Off the shoulder, long and straight. Cap sleeves. The material was so delicate it felt like air in her hands.

  There were matching black shoes and underwear. A strapless bra. Panties. Stockings.

  It was bad enough that she
’d actually told Sebastio she’d fantasised about being with him. It was as if there was no corner of her mind that he wasn’t privy to now. And Edie knew that if she was to indulge in this for a moment longer she’d be heading for a fall she might never recover from.

  She was nothing to Sebastio. An anomaly. A fleeting moment of lust that would soon burn out for him.

  She put the dress back in the box. She couldn’t do this. She’d never been someone who couldn’t face up to reality and now she really needed to face up to reality.

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  ‘SHE’S WHAT?’

  ‘She’s gone, Sebastio. She left with Jimmy earlier. There’s a note in your office.’

  For a moment after Matteo had walked away, Sebastio simply did not believe what he’d said. No one walked away from him. Not since he’d been a child, when he’d become so inured to watching his parents walk away that he’d vowed never to let anyone else have that power over him.

  He felt as if someone had just punched him in the chest. Winded. That sensation he’d had the previous day of something slipping out of his grasp mocked him.

  He went into his office and closed the door behind him. He saw the small piece of paper on his desk and went over. Something else was starting to fill him now. Anger.

  He picked it up. Read the neat, concise writing.

  Dear Sebastio,

  I hope you won’t be too inconvenienced if I leave now, as the last party is tonight.

  I hope you’ll find that everything is in order. I will, of course, be back to ensure the efficient removal of the Christmas dressing at an appropriate time.

  Thank you for the opportunities you’ve given me, Sebastio.

  All the best,

  Edie

  He stared at it for a long minute.

  Thank you for the opportunities...

  Was she including the unburdening of her innocence in that? Sebastio had a white-hot memory flash of how it had felt to thrust into Edie’s body that first time. The exquisite torture of it as he’d had to control himself so as not to hurt her.

  His first cynical thought was that she was playing some game. Running away so he’d go after her. But almost immediately it rang hollow. She didn’t play games. She wouldn’t know how.

  Sebastio threw the note down and went to the window of his office. He could see the guests arriving now in their droves and he felt sick.

  The black and white of his tuxedo was reflected in the window. He’d never felt like this before—unmoored.

  Why the hell had she left?

  * * *

  It was Christmas Eve and Edie was walking home from the local shop, where everyone had been panic-buying before everything shut down in a few hours. The beautiful, pristine snow had turned to slush in the last few days and the air was bitingly cold with thick leaden skies overhead.

  The glinting, winking Christmas lights and decorations nearby looked garish and cheap, and Edie told herself a little caustically that Sebastio had ruined her for Christmas.

  She tried not to think of Sebastio and what his reaction would have been when he got her note. He wouldn’t have been happy, because he didn’t like anything happening that wasn’t on his terms. But she figured that he wouldn’t have been too bothered. He would have gone down to the party and soon forgotten about Edie.

  She clamped down on the stupid sense of self-pity. She’d never indulged in it before and wasn’t about to start now.

  She’d spoken to her parents earlier, and they’d sounded so delighted with themselves in the Bahamas that it had made up for everything.

  Even falling for Sebastio? a small voice whispered.

  Edie fiercely denied it to herself, but it rang hollow.

  Jimmy had been sweet enough to invite Edie to spend Christmas Day with him and his family, but she’d declined, preferring the thought of being alone so she could try and get over the impact Sebastio had had on her life.

  On her heart.

  As she approached the tall white house where she lived on the top floor, she told herself stoutly that lots of people spent Christmas alone. With no decorations. Or presents. Or a fancy turkey dinner with all the trimmings. She could do this. She’d be fine.

  But her treacherous mind automatically wandered to what Sebastio would be doing for Christmas. Maybe he’d already left the country now that his social engagements were over?

  So when Edie heard her name being called by a familiar voice she thought she was having an aural hallucination. She scowled as she stuck her key in the door, but it came again, with a trace of irritation this time.

  ‘Edie...’

  The irritation convinced her it must be real. She turned around slowly, to see Sebastio standing at the bottom of the steps leading up to her house. She blinked. He didn’t disappear.

  He was dressed in black trousers and a black top. A long dark overcoat with the collar turned up. When she allowed herself to believe he wasn’t an apparition giddy joy rushed through her before she could stop it. She’d really believed she wouldn’t see him again.

  And then the joy was diluted by a delayed sense of self-preservation kicking in. She came down until she was at his eye level on the bottom step. Somehow it didn’t make her feel as if she had any advantage.

  ‘Sebastio. What are you doing here?’

  He looked grim. ‘Why did you leave before the party?’

  Edie glanced away for a moment. And then back. She moved aside to let some people up the steps. She saw their curious glances at Sebastio, and then he caught her arm and tugged her aside. Even through her thick Puffa jacket she could feel the impact of his touch, her nerve-endings tingling.

  ‘Edie, we can’t talk here. Let’s go up to your apartment.’

  Panic spiked at the thought of being alone with him in her tiny intimate space. ‘No.’

  ‘Please.’

  She looked at him. His mouth was tense.

  ‘I’m not leaving till you agree to talk to me. We can do it here, or at my apartment in Mayfair.’

  Edie knew very well she was no match for Sebastio’s determination. Something gave way inside her. ‘Okay, your apartment. But I’m not staying for long.’

  He inclined his head. ‘Of course. You can leave whenever you wish.’

  He stood back and a driver jumped out of the vehicle behind Sebastio to open the door. Edie took a breath and stepped forward, getting in with her shopping bags. Sebastio got in on the other side, immediately dwarfing the space. His scent wound around Edie like a siren call. A male siren call.

  The vehicle pulled into the street and Edie absorbed the shock still reverberating through her body.

  Sebastio asked, ‘You were shopping?’

  She looked at the plastic bags she was still clutching like shields and put them down at her feet. ‘Just some supplies for the next couple of days, when the shops are shut.’ The kind of thing a man like Sebastio wouldn’t have to worry about with the world at his beck and call 24/7.

  ‘You’re not going home for Christmas?’

  She shook her head. ‘My parents are away. I bought them a Caribbean cruise as a gift for Christmas.’

  ‘With the money I paid you?’

  Edie looked at Sebastio. ‘Does it matter?’

  ‘No... You can do what you want with the money. So,’ he continued, ‘you are going to be spending Christmas alone?’

  ‘Yes.’

  There was a long moment of silence before Sebastio said, ‘You could spend Christmas with me.’

  Edie looked at him as something helpless flowed through her. A sense of inevitability. ‘Sebastio...no.’

  Sebastio merely pushed a button in the partition between the front and the back of the car and the privacy window slid up with a slight hiss. The tinted windows lent the back of the car a cocoon-like aspect.

 
He moved closer and Edie was rooted to the seat. She could see the dark flecks of grey in his eyes. The line of stubble on his jaw. The thick luxuriousness of his hair.

  He had taken her woollen cap off her head before she could stop him, and he threw it somewhere behind him.

  ‘Hey...’ she said, but it sounded weak. Ineffectual.

  ‘Spend Christmas with me.’

  He was bending towards her, giving her time to pull back. To say no. But she couldn’t form the words. All she could see was his mouth, and she felt so hungry to taste him again. He stopped a few inches away. Torturously. Testing her will. And Edie knew then that she didn’t have the strength to deny this man. No matter what the cost.

  She reached out and put her hands on his coat, pulled him forward. Their mouths crashed together and Sebastio reached all the way around her to pull her to his body. She was ravenous for him. Desperate.

  After long minutes of re-tasting and relearning, Sebastio pulled back. Edie was barely aware that the car was moving and London was passing by outside. They could have been on the moon.

  He shook his head. ‘Why would you deny yourself this?’

  At that precise moment Edie was wondering exactly the same thing. This was vital to her well-being. A life-force coursing through her veins and arteries. Right now she thought she’d die without it. Even if it would kill her in the end—emotionally.

  Edie wasn’t unaware of the irony. She knew that falling for Sebastio and continuing the affair when she knew it was bad for her wasn’t a million miles away from taking chemotherapy—which had been as toxic as it had been beneficial.

  A little giggle escaped her as a kind of euphoric hysteria gripped her for a minute. Then she stopped and reached up to touch his jaw, tracing the hard line.

  ‘Yes,’ she whispered. ‘I’ll spend Christmas with you.’

  Sebastio felt intense satisfaction and not a little triumph. Things he wouldn’t usually associate with women. When he’d seen Edie on the street, walking back to her drab-looking house on a very pedestrian street, he’d had to battle the compulsion to open the door, grab her, pull her into the car and take her far away. He’d had to force himself to be civilised.